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| This goat won Best Tongue Award of 2017 |
The problem with the game was a lack of depth. Eventually, games have to be fun for replay value and enjoyment. While Goat Simulator was fun for a few minutes, the lack of depth, goals, or direction meant the luster wore off quickly. Even in a game where you can be an asshole animal to all other inhabitants, it has to be fun beyond the novelty. Well, that and the beyond shitty graphics.
Enter Untitled Goose Game.
Created by developers House House (literally four people down in Australia), Untitled Goose Game gets this delicate balance right. Not only can you be a raging asshole causing problems for the inhabitants of Random Village, but the puzzles can be a real challenge. The puzzles, cute graphics, amusing sound effects, and hilarious moments, and overall insanity of being an asshole make it a game worth buying.
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| "You broke this vase, you jackass! Not some goose!" |
What's a Goose to Do?
You start the game innocently enough. You wander into a groundskeeper who is going about his day watering flowers and vegetables. In a matter of a few minutes you've stolen his radio, turned on his water, took away his keys and threw them in a lake, and if you're lucky, stole his hat. Oh, and you put together the items to make a wonderful picnic lunch.
The gameplay mechanics are simple. Honk, run, bend down to pick up items, and spread your wings. It's how you use these these controls to win the day. Honking loudly tends to get the attention of any human in the vicinity, but the second you steal something and get caught, they come running. The humans are faster than you, which means you have to time your thefts/annoyances at the right time.
A good example is trying to take the groundskeeper's rake. You can distract him by turning on the garden's water. While he has his back turned, take off with the rake. Or, throw something else in the near pond (like his keys). While he's fishing those out of the water, take off with that rake and hide it until he goes back in his garden. Or steal some carrots for the picnic. While he's getting those back, get that rake!
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| "Given a chance, I will gut you like a fish." |
The hijinks continue well beyond the garden. You run into a kid who is terrified of geese, a shopkeeper who is smart enough to always have a broom nearby to sweep you away, a man who is simply trying to enjoy his newspaper and tea, and so on and so forth. Every human brings unique goals and situations that change up the formula just enough to keep it fresh.
When Assholes Attack
There's also something endearing about playing the literal asshole of the animal kingdom. There are plenty of open world games where you can be an asshole, but it's not engaging beyond the shock value of throwing a sticky bomb on a beer truck and blowing a small hole in a city block. Beyond the act itself, the joy fades as quickly as your life when cops shoot you down.
But not so as a goose. You are in the webbed virtual feet of nature's real life counterpart. You are the asshole nature intended. If geese were more nefarious, I bet your ass they would steal your rake. Why would a goose steal your rake? Fuck you, that's why.
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| Dealing with the goose beats dealing with MLM salespeople. |
That's not to suggest the game is perfect. Compared to other puzzle games out there, Untitled Goose Game is pretty simple. It's a short game - no more than 3-4 hours at most. Not a single person has a gun in Random Village (so clearly Random Village is not in the United States). Seems like that'd be an easy way to take out an annoying goose. There's also no Canadian geese, which is disappointing. As annoying as regular geese are, Canadian geese arguably take the asshole cake.
Is the game worth it? Yes. The last time I laughed and cackled so much playing a video game was while playing Portal 2. Is it perfect? No. But if you want to enact your fantasy/fetish of being a webbed bird honking at all passerby - or if you want a funny, cute puzzle game - this game is for you.
